I listen to fast paced music.
It must drown out my thoughts and take my anger and frustration away with its fleeting notes.
Music to stomp and paw the earth by.
Music to live and die by.
Music to conquer and fight by.
I set my teeth in determination. Gone is anger. Replaced, it is, with resolve.
I go outside.
Go outside and feel the pouring rain on my face.
Feel the sodden earth and slick mud beneath my boots.
Find a dying rabbit in the rabbitry.
The sky is black.
The air is pungent. Smelling of wet earth.
There is life and death swirling around me.
I go inside, and listen to loud music.
And feel better for it.
I will make this farm work.
So help me God.